Congratulations on your Engagement!
We are here to guide you in receiving the Sacrament of Holy Matrimony.
To begin your planning process, please contact the Anne Darcy at 631-757-8184 x318.
The following booklet is a guide for you to use as well as music selections for your wedding ceremony at
Our Lady Queen of Martyrs.
| Wedding Booklet | Wedding Music |
Steps for Planning Your Marriage at OLQM
"Love needs time and space; everything else is secondary. Time is needed to talk things over, to embrace leisurely, to share plans, to listen to one other and gaze in each other's eyes, to appreciate one another and to build a stronger relationship."-Amoris Laetitia - Pope Francis
On behalf of the Our Lady Queen of Martyrs faith community, please accept our congratulations at this wonderful time! We are delighted you have come to the parish to plan your wedding. You are expressing your belief that of the many aspects of preparing for the great day, the celebration of the Sacrament of Marriage is at the center of your plans.
Helping to prepare engaged couples for marriage is a special ministry at Our Lady Queen of Martyrs. We pray you will open your hearts and minds as you begin your journey towards this most important commitment.
Our parish will do all we can to help you make your marriage ceremony a joyous and sacred event - an experience all present will truly say was “the best part of the day.”
To begin planning for your wedding, please call the Rectory at (631) 757-8184 for an appointment to meet with a priest or deacon.
At the initial interview, the engaged couple will meet with a priest or deacon. He will review the necessary information required by the Church and complete the Prenuptial Investigation Form.
The priest or deacon will introduce you to the Marriage Preparation Program at Our Lady Queen of Martyrs. After the initial meeting and delivery of the certified baptismal certificates for the couple, the wedding date may be set.
As part of the marriage preparation process, you will each be asked to complete a “FOCCUS” (Facilitating Open Couple Communication, Understanding and Study) Survey.
This survey reflects how well the feelings and expectations of each person complement the other. After completing it, most couples immediately begin to ask each other, “What did you put for that question?” The FOCCUS survey has worked. It assists both of you in discovering areas of communication you may not have considered.
The priest or deacon will invite you back within a few weeks to review the survey results.
Marriage Preparation is a requirement of the Catholic Church for all couples who will be celebrating the Sacrament of Marriage. Research has shown that couples who participate in a preparation process experience fewer difficulties in the first five years of marriage.
Our Lady Queen of Martyrs Marriage Preparation Program is offered once a year during the winter months. It consists of five sessions.
The Celebrant
The celebrant for your wedding will be one of Our Lady Queen of Martyrs’ priests or deacons. If you know a priest or deacon and wish to invite them to celebrate your wedding you are most welcome to do so. You are asked to have the priest or deacon write to our pastor, Rev. Stephen J Pietrowski, for permission to perform the ceremony.
Your Wedding Liturgy
The celebrant will meet with you to discuss the plans for your wedding liturgy, including your music selections, once you have completed the Marriage Preparation Program. This is a very important part of the process and the celebrant will be happy to assist you. It is helpful to complete the liturgy planning several months before the wedding so you may prepare your wedding programs. We can provide sample booklets as a guide.
Photography
To ensure the solemnity of your liturgy, we require photographers and/or videographers to be stationed behind the congregation and remain there for the entire ceremony. They may not move around the Church during the ceremony and no additional lighting sources are permitted. Pictures may be taken at the altar after the ceremony, providing there is not another ceremony or celebration of Mass immediately following.
Church Decorations
You are welcome to provide floral arrangements for your wedding. Our Wedding Coordinator will be able to answer any questions regarding flowers.
For the safety of the guests at your wedding, flower petals, rice, and aisle runners are not permitted. Bubbles may be used to “shower” the bride and groom outside the Church.
Wedding Music
Suggestions in document. See Wedding Music Booklet button above on this page
Baptismal Certificate
Our Lady Queen of Martyrs is required to have a recently issued Baptismal Certificate on file. You need to contact the parish where you were baptized and have them send you a Baptismal Certificate certified as true and correct within six months of its delivery. This will have the record of other sacraments you have received. Your original Baptismal Certificate or a photocopy is not acceptable.
Marriage License
This may be obtained at any Town Hall in NY State no more than 60 days prior to your Marriage Ceremony. Your marriage license should be brought to your wedding rehearsal. It will then be signed by two witnesses, your Best Man and Maid of Honor and given to our wedding coordinator.
Offerings
All Offerings should be brought to the rectory two weeks prior to the wedding in envelope clearly marked with the couple’s name and wedding date.
The Church Offering for a wedding is $750 for parish families. If you are from outside the parish there will be an additional fee. The check should be made out to the Our Lady Queen of Martyrs.
If you choose to have other musicians or request someone other than ours, it would be in addition to the set offering. Any additional musicians must be approved by our Music Coordinator.
It is customary to make an offering for the Altar Servers. ($15 is suggested.)
With all of your preparation completed, we are confident your wedding ceremony will be the special and joyful celebration of which you have dreamed. Thank you in advance for your efforts at being on time, as the Church is often in use for various liturgies.
We hope this webpage answers any questions you may have and provides you with the information necessary to plan your wedding at Our Lady Queen of Martyrs.
We are here to support you now and throughout your married life. Please feel free to contact us with any further questions (631) 757-8184.
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